Dirty Laundry

As I am writing this post several strangers are roaming my home, taking it for a test drive. I actually invited them into my private life, with signs at each end of the street guiding them into my secret hide away on Harvard.

We bought this house 7 years ago, it was like a junior high school crush with the class hunk. I practically threw myself through the windshield as I braked at the "For Sale" sign. Something in my head said "I MUST HAVE THIS HOUSE!!!"

When Cheryl came home I took her over, I knew she couldn't resist leaded glass windows, we put in a full price offer and 35 days later it was ours.

We bought the house from a single mother of 2 who had raised her children and was now alone, she owned the home for 29 years. I was highly critical of the condition of the home, not realizing what I know now that her neglect of the home was not from a lack of love but from the overwhelming task of caring for a 80 year old home.

Over the 7 years we have; remolded the basement, added a family room, gutted the kitchen, completely re-landscaped the back and front yards, painted every wall, stripped molding, corrected hideous decorating era's and moved from infatuation to complete fulfillment.

I began to see that it was time to move on when one day I realized I had not gone into the basement, with the exception of laundry for 3 months. I hadn't sat in my living room all winter, nor had I entered any of the guest bedrooms for 2 months. I dreaded walking our stairs and dreamed of a one level home. We were rattling around in a home that deserved a family!


As we prepared for the sale of our love we were reminded of several left over projects; painting a table leg, staining the kitchen island, replacing molding, touching up every paint chip in sight, adding top soil, and removing old tar. Little things you overlook as the years pass on.





Its just Deb and I roaming around in 4 our of 15 rooms, once in a while when the grand kids and family come I can 0nce again hear Dana and Nate, arguing, laughing, talking and playing, they left too soon!






This house deserves to have children, and family, parties, holidays and love. That is what I hope for; someone who will love this house as much as I do.

Lucky Day

"Mamma this is my lucky day, I got a cookie, and Panda Express and I got to be with you and Mommy" Warren

Dana and I decided to do a little late maternity shopping, I believe all pregnant woman should have new cloths for the home stretch. Soooo....I called Dana and asked her to meet me at Fashion Place Mall, she decided to pull Warren out of school early to spend some quality time with Grandma and Mommy. It was an AWESOME afternoon, Warren got what he asked for...Mrs. Fields chocolate dipped cookie, orange chicken from from Panda Express, new "vampire" shoes for Halloween (they also double as school shoes) and a ride on the kiddie roller coaster, what more could a 6 year old want!!!!

Dana has some new outfits to make it through the "I feel so big" months and I got to spend time with two of few of my favorite people!!

Wyatt is next on my list of quality time, which he reminds me of in his daily phone calls...."Momma I want you pick me up and get lurpy".....so I guess I'm off to the 7-11 for a "lurpy".

I love this quality time stuff.....1 down 3 more to go!!!!!

Wyatt, Poop and Mother's Day!

Momma, I poop!!

This was Wyatt's greeting to me as I picked up he and Warren for their monthly sleepover with Momma Mates (the name Warren gave me when he started to talk). I should say that the sleep over is for the boys to sleep and for me to lay awake making sure they are breathing, comfortable and not peeing the bed!!! Needless to say I am ready for bed at 3:15 p.m.!!!!

Its hard for me to put into words my love for Dana and Nathan and for the grand kids. As many of you know my children did not come to me in the normal fashion, Cheryl, their mother allowed me to become their mother and to claim them as my own. All of them have brought such joy and love into my life. I have come to understand my own mother's struggle with my decision more clearly while I watch them forge ahead with their own lives (in spite of what I may want them to do). I now get to cherish loving my grand children, spoiling them with ice cream for breakfast, 4 trips to the hot tub, 3 "tubby" times, beating grandma at Mariocart and me loving cleaning up after them!! I get to do the things I wish I would have done as a mother more often while Dana and Nate were still at home!! So on this Mother's Day, once again I want to thank Cheryl and Tad for making me a mother!!!!


P.S.
Whahoo, congrats to Dana who now instead of changing diapers only has to wipe a darling little boys bottom!!!

"Swarm" Ball

Ever since Kendall started playing soccer at age 3 I have thought that the more appropriate name should be SWARM ball......Really its like watching a beehive! Saturday Deb and I went to the kids soccer game, Deb entertained Wyatt and I took pictures, these are just a few of the many I could choose from, I won't bore you with all of them!!!













Warren, looking at Dana, I love the way this photo worked out!!!

Deb was teasing Wyatt, letting him pretend to pull out her nose ring....













Mckayla, it was so cold!!!!

















Wyatt is such a cutey!!!









Mckayla, Wyatt, Warren after the fierce soccer battle!!!!

Finally Pictures!!!!

I finally got this uploading picture thing down.........



Jake and Kathryn's new baby Jane















John one of our "Sand Lot" boys.

















Anne's Andrew

















Allison's Peter










Emily and Victoria

















Colin, Cory, Jessica

















Kendall, Mathew, Betsey and Lauren......





Caitlin, Patricia (holding Jane), Jonthan









Jon and John searching for Mike's lost Easter egg......















More to come....................

The Queen is 80!

The Queen turned 80 in March.















SHUSH! Even the Queen needs a nap!!!

I am a Liar

Ok........here I go confession time!

I bought a leather jacket last September, I keep hoping that I will find the "one" that I keep forever.

When I was a kid I would get my new school clothes, hang them in my closet, look at them each day until it was time to wear them. Problem was I didn't want them to get old so I would open the closet doors look at them, shut the doors and decide to wear them tomorrow. It didn't take long I would finally put them on, wear them, and thennnnn............they ended up old, and on my bedroom floor.

And so I come to the present, for 3 or 4 years running I have purchased a leather jacket, thinking I had found the "ONE"! That this year I would not only buy the long sought after jacket, but, I would actually find the right occasion to wear the jacket. Well this was not to be the year, I found the jacket tucked away in my closet awaiting its premier while changing out my winter clothes for my summer clothes (moving my black uniform of winter to the back of the closet for my black uniform of spring).

This is were my confession comes in, I bought the jacket at Nordstrom, as I was walking into the store to return the jacket I found myself coming up with just the right statement as to why I was returning the jacket at the end of the season.

"I bought this for a friend and it didn't fit" (sorry I don't pay this much for birthday's)

"I bought this for my mother and she didn't like it" (you must really love your mother)

"I just wasn't happy with the way it fit" (why take so long to return it dummy)

As I was walking toward the store I thought "why in the world can't you just tell the truth?" Well of course you can, "I found this jacket in my closet, didn't wear it, and so I am returning it" this was what I was going to say when she asked.

So as I approached the desk and took out the jacket and placed it on the desk, it just came out I couldn't help it....."I bought this for my mother and it didn't fit, its such a beautiful jacket....blah blah blah........" AGH!!!! (again with the details) What is it about me that I have to explain every breath to every stranger......that is an questions for another post......or maybe not!

Well the jacket is safe back where it belongs, where someone who will let it become old will find it and take it home.

The Ungratefuls and tomato soup

I don't know the names of the "ungratefuls", I just know that they are the 13 and 7 year old granddaughters of Sue, my new knitting classmate. Apparently the off springs of her son don't know how to write thank you notes, call or even email their heart felt thanks to their grandmother.

I wish I knew the ungratefuls names it seems to strange to call someone such a name without ever having been offended by them. I laughed inside and knew enough to keep my mouth shut since I was one of those ungratefuls from years gone by!!!

Really didn't thank you notes go out with slips, gloves and hats? Guess not, and if and when my mother reads this I will be reminded of my ignorance!

This is my first knitting class, I thought it was time to find out how you really knit. It comes with all the requisite little old ladies, talk of grandchildren, (afore mentioned ungratefuls) hip replacements, friends of friends who broke a pelvis while reaching for a glass of water BLAH BLAH. On and on it went until in a hushed voice someone asked for the tomato soup recipe, "I've got it in my car" came the reply, "I love that recipe I won't eat another can of tomato soup". I thought to myself, "I love a good recipe can't wait to have that one". When Shirley came back with the recipe we all hurried to get our own copy. From the end of the table the command was given, "this recipe is a secret and I can only give it to the knitting class, please don't give it to anyone else", WOW, this must really be good I thought...........AND then it came my turn to write the blessed recipe down........under threat of my life I am going to give it to you......

Colleen's daughters' tomato soup (remember so good you will never eat another can of canned soup!!!

2 Cans Tomato Soup

1 Can Diced Tomato's

1TB Basil

1 tsp Paprika

2 cups Milk

Saute together:

2TBL Butter (by the way I think that olive oil would be better, but Colleen reports that would ruin the taste, and a little butter if "just fine"

Onion

Garlic

Mix all together and serve with dollop of sour cream

SHHHH don't tell, I might be labeled an ungrateful and get kicked out of my knitting class!!!

I'm going to the HIllams.........

"Where have you been?"

"At the Hillams."

This was the usual Sunday afternoon ritual, after church, dinner and dishes! (you could always count on dessert at the Hillam's)

Carolyn, Ray and the clan moved in sometime after we came from California. My first significant memory was loading into the back of a crowed car and traveling to Lagoon with Ray, my dad, and all the kids. That was beginning of the our mutual adoption process, that day we became Hillam's and they became Hickman's as if our home became separated by 4 homes on Locust Lane.

Can't even count the number of mornings our breakfast was punctuated by Ray's entrance into the house with the command to my father "Letsgo!" I then dutifully followed their lead down Ash Ave listening to one or more "arguments" about politics, sports, the weather, or whatever came to their minds.

The year of the "Miracle Bowl, my father couldn't take it any longer he grabbed his hat, coat and me in tow for the walk to Ray's. When we got there we sat on the basement stairs moaning about the impending BYU loss. As the tide began to turn for the Y and Glen Redd came up with the winning touch down, I watched Carolyn jump up and punch a hole in the drop ceiling tiles and my father bowed in front of the TV, with arms outstretched with crys of "OH LAVELL"

In later years Ray and Carolyn would sit with us in the ICU waiting room while we listened to the damage dad's heart had taken while playing racquetball with Ray and friends earlier that day. Ray would sit with Dad during the days following the heart attack.

Our entire family has benefited from Rays tireless work at the cabin, one I hope to never see leave the family, Hillam or Hickman!

The Hillam's have left Locust Lane so when Carolyn stopped by while I was making Curry for my mother I imagined that Carolyn had taken the short walk from 4 houses down. I imagined that Ray could walk and talk like the old days, that I would be able to stop and see anyone of the girls or Mark.

We are all grown up now, children of our own, some with grandchildren they all seem to mesh into the Hickman/Hillam clan. Even though Ray and Carolyn have moved I will always look to the west to see who is setting in the picture window of my "other home".

Curry the right way!

A few details......in 3 short acts:



Act I

Stopped for gas, so I didn't have to on the way home and be late picking up Warren and Wyatt for our grandma sleep over.

Phone rings.....



Mom: Where are you?!!


Me: Getting gas


Mom: AGHHHH!! Hurry!!



Act II

Arrive at mom's house, ground beef is already browning (not so subtle message). I start to chop the onions, get out the pressure cooker, put onions in the pot.

Mom: What does the recipe say?


Me: ummmm...brown the onions with the wa.....


Mom: Is that what the recipe says????


Me: (I know this answer just let me think!!!!) Put the onions in with the wa....


Mom: The recipe says to brown the beef, then put the meat in the pressure cooker and THEN, put the onions in the same pan and put the water in with the onions...


Me: Can't you put the onions in the pressu.....


Mom: That's not the way daddy made it!

(There you have it!!! I'm not just up against making my mother's curry recipe I have to do it the way "daddy" did. ( in case you didn't know, its not my daddy its hers).....I never met him and I've got to channel his culinary spirit in order to do this right!!!! Where is a psychic when I need one!!!



Act III

Mom leaves the kitchen, whew!!! I brown the onions, put the spices in, double what is printed in the book. Mom comes back into the kitchen...


Mom: Did you put the salt in?


Me: AAAHHH, what did I do know? Yup


Mom: How much?


Me: 4 Tablespoons, double the recipe.


Mom: Didn't you see me salt the meat? (another loaded question,, or is it rhetorical?)


Me: Yesssss..... I guessss...... I didn't notice how much you put in........is it bad?

Mom: silence

I try to catch Anne's eye, she's fighting with the carpet cleaner, Kendall enters the kitchen....

Me: Kendall wanna go for ride with me for a hotdog and A-1 Sauce?

Kendall: I can go get it for you....

Me SHHHHH!! (quietly) come on honey you can help me carry the hot dogs......

Kendall: OH! Ok, sure come on lets go......(nieces are awesome!)


Post Script:

Carolyn Hillam (our other mother) came by, we laughed about ourselves and a few others, said how it was a sin that they moved out of the neighborhood and then sent Carolyn home with some of my curry for Ray, (I love that man!!!!)

I am a BOOB!!!!

I imagine it all started in the incubator, not sure but a good hunch that my tears came from my X and Y chromosomes!!! I know that my Grandmother Emmett was well endowed with prolific tears ducts because she passed them onto her daughter, Joann, my mother. My father, Martin, hide it well until his heart attack at which time the flood gates opened and he could no longer shed them in silence!!

I have to blame Larry Miller's death for my recent onslaught, "for crying out loud"! I cried when his wife sat next to his empty chair on Saturday's game, I cried with Derron William's gave her the game ball, I cried when Kyle Korver gave her a post game hug, I cried when Larry cried in a video tribute where he expressed his love for Utah. I really let lose when I tried to sing the National Anthem, that definitely came from my dad!!!!

Tonight I cried when Ruth Bader Ginsberg entered congress to hear President Obama speak (by the way, she is two weeks out of surgery for cancer), I cried when the cabinet entered the chambers, I cried when the President entered the chambers, I cried when the solider was honored, I cried for the little girl who wrote a letter to congress asking for help with her school proclaiming "we are not quiters"!!!

Just to be fair I also cried at the commercial where Bob Dylan and Will I AM sing, and at certain times of the month I have been known to cry at a McDonald's commercial.

When my first grandson, Warren, was born I was at Dana's head with the video camera and lets just say that my crying necessitated some creative editing!!! When the second grandson, Wyatt, came along I stayed steady and still cried......

Deb has become so adept at noticing my held back tears that with just one look I can't hold them back and have to explain why I'm crying for instance; Wyatt just said I love you, the sun is shinning, the moon is full, Dana is such a good mother, Christmas lights are so pretty......you get the picture, it doesn't take much!!!


I am a BIG BOOB!!!!! I will keep on crying because my tears remind me that my emotions are better spent then held inside. They remind me how much I love my country, my children, grandchildren, family, and partner.

I guess you could say I cry therefore I am....Whatever that means!!!

"Do you make curry" and other details......

Mom: Melissa, do you make curry?

Me: UMMMM yyeess.....why?

Mom: Well..........Bob and Lucy are coming into town, and the temple is closed for two weeks, and they love curry, and you never know when they will just show up on your doorstep, and when the temple opens.....(I am now officially lost in the details!!)

LATER that evening:

Me: Do you make Curry and what recipe do you use?

Anne: Yes, why?

Me: UMMMM.....Bob and Lucy......the temple closing.....they love curry....etc....and I am not sure what recipe to use....

Anne: Good luck!!! I've got to get ready for my boyscout overnight....I mean Andrew has to get ready for his overnight.....BYE HAHAHA!!!!

The reason for the recipe inquisition is that my mother has put her family curry recipe in print, and its the one I use and it never tastes the same as my mothers. Anne informs me that the printed copy does not contain the same amount spices, AGHHHH! I have been a "failure" at curry and its not my fault!!!!

I will be going down to my ancesteral home ( like that touch) to make curry. I will be making copious notes, sans the details, i.e. the temple closing etc, as my mother gives me the actual recipe!!! Them maybe I will have a fighting chance in the family curry making.

Here are a few of my own details; Grampa Emmett went to Japan on his mission, he came home and tried to duplicate a dish from his mission, Curry, which has become the family dish.

Its genetic, the details, how will anyone get the whole picture if you don't give them all the details?

Happy Birthday "Bootsey"

Today is #5's birthday and Anne is on her way down to Las Vegas to surprise Betsey with gifts from 1,2,3,4 and 6. Betsey is the only sib that lives outside of Utah, just close enough to be far away. Over the years whenever Betsey came to town, life stopped and we played.

The best Betsey visit ever happened the year Dad died. We all were trying to find our Christmas bearings, who would read the Christmas story and help mom light the candles? I had spent a lot of effort trying to talk Betsey into coming home for Christmas to no avail. Betsey and Richard had spent a lot of time before and after the furneral in Provo, they had young kids and traveling around the holidays is not a summer picnic.

On Christmas Eve that year, round dinner time, carolers came to our door and Anne refused to answer the door (she was in on the whole thing). So I went to the door and "what to my wondering eyes did appear......" Yup it was Betsey, Richard et. al. I believe there was screaming, I know there was crying and pure joy at the sight of the whole family standing in front of us!!!

That was the best Betsey visit ever!!!!

In her honor feel free to sing along!!!!

Happy Happy Birthday Betsey dear
Happy days will come to you all year
If I had one wish then it would be
a Happy Happy Birthday to you from me!!!!!

ILYBATWSY!!!!!!

Me

Y Mountain and Anne's diapers

I was "home" on Tuesday, the home of my youth at the foot of Y mountain. I grew up in the Oak Hills area of Provo, close enough that we could walk to our elementary school, Wasatch. My memory is clouded now by time and a loss of essential hormones that allow me to recall my past quickly and in accurate detail (and to actually see this screen without magnifying aids).

I do remember the day that my elementary class, somewhere between 2nd and 6th grade took the long and winding road to the Y on "my" mountain. I remember some of the hike, which from my couch in Salt Lake some 40 odd years later doesn't seem so hard, although I'm sure I could never replicate the event today!!!

What I do remember with such clarity is finally reaching the top, sitting down with Sandra Tippetts, my best friend and following my mother's instructions started searching for my house. I could see the church, Carson's Market, Gene's Texaco, Wasatch, Kiwanis Park, I followed all the roads, up Briar, down Locust, got lost somewhere near Maple, (we had to find Sandra's house too). Finally there she was exactly as she described standing in our front yard waving Anne's white cloth diaper.

Anne's diaper has waved many times in my head over the years pulling me back to my home at the base of Y mountain. On my mission when I thought I would never survive a companionship I looked for the diaper for comfort. When I needed to make difficult decsions about work, moving myself back to Utah I looked for the diaper for direction. When Betsey, Richard, myself, and all the kids made the long road trip back after news of Dads death I looked for the diaper for strength.

Me

Baking bread, finding my mother, finding myself

I've started baking bread again, this time for myself and for those who happen to pass by as they come out of the oven..

I bake for solice, for life, for giving, I bake for myself. I had lost the memory of creating something for myself, something that brings me closer to my mother.....to her guidance, her wisdom, to her love...

I am like my mother, a thought that used to bring fear that I might be exactly like her, cough and all!!! I now know that I could never be my mother, she is much larger than life, larger than I could can ever hope to be. But somewhere deep inside of my genetic code she is there, guiding me through life's travails and helping me see myself clearer.

I bake becasue I learned from my mother to give, to care, to love and yes to cough (she still takes the cake in her cough volume)....

Pickle Ladies continued.......

Well, Well, Well she finally did it! A little shame goes along way!! What are sisters for if not to put them in their place, especially the BABY!!!!

I laughed myself silly when I got Anne's email, I was in the pedicure chair! I had to tell Bonnie, the nail tech, the whole pickle story and then we laughed together, because she too has sisters!! Hey if Debbie Fields and Famous Amos can make their millions on cookies why can't pickles be our mode of transportation.....I must admit shopping with a white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookie is preferable to a pickle!!!

HOWEVER, if you don't try we will never know!!!!

I will be posting pictures of the pickles as soon as I get my charger.....

Me

P.S. If none of this makes sense, read my very first post and then go to SandApipe.blogspot.com
and remember the REAL order number is 801-280-8500

Thinking, Speaking, Editing

Ok here I go again...

The name of my blog will come as no suprise to those of you who know me in the slightest!!

"Melissa, remember dear think before you speak" was not only the directive I received from by mother almost everyday of my life, it has become adult mantra. As evidence to this wise motherly advise my first blog had to be re-re-edited by my, very patient and kind partner.

The humor was not lost on me, Anne or Deb!!!

Me

What if......

Grandma what if we were all water and swam with the dolphins and whales?

Grandma what if we were robots, Grandma how do you make robots?

Grandma what if we were in Heaven?

Grandma what if..........

Warren spent our car rides today pondering the "what if's" of the world. I am constantly amazed at how their little minds work!!!

Today Deb finished a phone call and Warren could tell she was upset so he gave her his 5 year old advice: "Debbie, you can take a deep breath and count to 10 that will help you feel better". Warren then proceeded to tell Deb that she didn't have to close her eyes and began counting outloud with her. Afterwards he asked her "Debbie don't you feel better?" After we smiled at each other "Debbie" declared that she felt "much better"

I absolutely love these kids!!!!

What if being a Grandma was the best thing in the whole world!!!!!

Pickle Ladies

Well here it goes!!! My little sister, Anne Hickman Pipe (801-280-8500, you'll need her number later on in my tirade!!)

I must admit that it was my idea in the first place, she just said she would blog about it and never did!!! ( this is what you call payback!!!)

I had the 'brain fart" in July that we, Anne and I, should make our Grandmother Hickman's sweet pickles to sell.   I must add she agreed to it, she just didn't know that I was going to follow through with the hair brained scheme.   I surprised even myself!!!  Well, to make a long story very short I've got loads of sweet pickles in my basement.   Did I say loads?  

Yup I said loads,

not just sweet ones, mustard's too.....Oh and by the way, they are delicious just ask any Hickman!!!

Well now comes the need for number.  Call Anne to order your pickles for next year or, if you want some now call her.   Call Anne and ask her about not keeping her promises or just call her anytime, she loves it when she gets calls early a.m.!!! (just kidding about the early calls)